Here's to tears and turning corners

Hello. It's been a while - feels like an age - since I did a blog post. It's been a heavy few months indeed. I've had my head down, grafting away in survival mode I suppose, both of us have. It's been a difficult transition moving to New Zealand, much more so than I ever could have anticipated. It's deep-level stuff, psychological and emotional, unseen and thus unexpected; certainly caught me off guard. So much of what we expected has been dashed or severely reevaluated, and yet ultimately, what a positive experience.

I remember just before we left the states I wrote a post about negative spaces and the like, but it seems as if I had it wrong somehow. Silence, like shadow, is the true negative space, the no-thing that defines the some-thing, and my absence from this blog has been its expression. I used to be the kind of person who would never proclaim a positive experience or a fortunate turn of events for fear of jinxing it, but thankfully I'm not like that anymore. During the past week or so it has felt like Wellington, the land here, has begun to open up for us, slowly, but definitely surely. It's an awesome feeling, like taking a huge deep breath after climbing a particularly nasty mountain. I don't want to make a big deal out of this, I just wanted proclaim the turning of a corner, there on the deep, unseen level . And also to say hey and hi and wow and thank you.

'On the surface there, where eyes shine like midnight pines and smile saw-tooth grins.'

P.S. There's a song if you click the title.

Maori-Hongi. The traditional way of greeting.

 

I got the above two images off the internet...aren't they awesome? What is even more awesome is that Hongi is still the way to greet each other in the Maori culture here in New Zealand. I find it intimate, real, and beautiful. 

I started relief teaching on Friday (Yay!!) and was fortunate enough to be part of the crew preparing the kids from ages 8-11, of all different cultures, for their initiation ceremony happening next week. They are basically going to be adopted into the Maori family and it is a kind of "right of passage." The children are ridiculously excited. They have to learn the words, songs and steps of the ceremony. Wow. Two traditional Maori elders came to the school in the afternoon to perfect the ritual and make sure the kids know exactly what to next week. It is a sacred ceremony and it is fascinating to see how seriously the children take it and how solemnly they learn. 

If you would like to have an idea of the beginning of the ceremony, have a look at Whale rider, a stunning New Zealand movie that shows a part of the initiation of the village boys. The following URL is an excerpt from the movie. The welcoming ceremony part is about  quarter of the way in: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=rSYWz4Z3idc (I really recommend seeing the whole film though. It is magical)

The children are going to sleep over in a Hoturoa Marae. A traditional Maori meeting place where the ceremony will be performed. They will learn different traditional Maori arts such as weaving, basket-making and fishing.

Hoturoa Marae

It was an interesting experience as I can not speak Maori, but the kids helped me so much in the pronunciation of things! Funny to see little European kiddies rattling off in Maori. I was grateful for such a special day. :)

The strangest thing has started to happen this last week...my heart has slowly started to open in slithers and I can feel the warm flowing of love and appreciation for this place streaming out on odd occasions when I least expect it. Which is very surprising, as I had no idea that my chest was so tightly clamped shut. But in these moments, the lightness of spirit and happiness I feel would overwhelm me, as their sudden appearance make their scarcity these last few months just so much more pronounced.

It is something I never paid much attention to...How, when you are in your familiar and comfortable environment, your heart is open and receptive, ready to respond to whatever stimulus it receives with enthusiasm and confidence or reluctance and nonchalance; whatever the mood of the day may be. Even daunting tasks do not look so daunting when you are surrounded by the familiar and by loved ones who help you solidify and justify your decisions and actions.
But when in an unknown place with challenges unlike any I've experienced before, my body's natural reaction seems to be to shut my heart as tightly as it can in its cage of ribs, tucking those embracing and flowing sails that reach into the world firmly away.
No wonder I've been so sad!
But I think now enough time has passed to start trusting this new environment and myself in it and I am just exhausted from unconsciously keeping the world out and myself safe. So whoop whoop! you brave heart, lets do this thing together... :)

I am starting relief teaching this week which I'm sure would prove to be a very interesting experience! Wish me luck!

The photos below are from some of the walks Russell and I did around town last week.

Russell and I went walking on farmland about 15 minutes drive from where we stay. The area is called Belmont and it is where the city suddenly becomes rural. We walked among cows and climbed the tallest hill until we could see the ocean. It was absolutely icy up there. We saw that the mountains on the South island were snow capped, so that explained the numbed noses and fingertips!

The hills in this area used to be used for military bunkers. Some of them are still standing as you'll see in the pictures. If I was a farmer I would transform them into shelters for the animals...they have lovely thick walls!

Is that a boat?! No...just a rock. Had me fooled there for a second!

 

    "To See a World..."  
(Fragments from "Auguries of Innocence" by William Blake, one of my favourite poets) 

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand 
And Eternity in an hour.

A Robin Redbreast in a Cage
Puts all Heaven in a Rage.
A dove house fill’d with doves and pigeons
Shudders Hell thro’ all its regions.
A Dog starv’d at his Master’s Gate
Predicts the ruin of the State.
A Horse misus’d upon the Road
Calls to Heaven for Human blood.
Each outcry of the hunted Hare
A fiber from the Brain does tear.

He who shall train the Horse to War
Shall never pass the Polar Bar.
The Beggar’s Dog and Widow’s Cat,
Feed them and thou wilt grow fat.
The Gnat that sings his Summer song 
Poison gets from Slander’s tongue.
The poison of the Snake and Newt
Is the sweat of Envy’s Foot.

A truth that’s told with bad intent
Beats all the Lies you can invent.
It is right it should be so;
Man was made for Joy and Woe;
And when this we rightly know
Thro’ the World we safely go.

 

   

A homage to my homeland

Sorting through our travel photos yesterday, I came across some never-before-published pictures from our Orange-river trip in Namibia. We did the trip with my mum and brother. It was a truly magical family experience. 

Although I think that some of these pictures are simply magnificent, they do not come close to capturing the true splendor and vastness of the land in Namibia. This was July 2011. Enjoy!